Life's Like That

Monday, October 15, 2007

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In Laga Chunari Mein Daag, Rani's patron takes her to office parties and introduces her to his associates as his company's " PR Manager". I sincerely hope none of my clients introduce me to people as their company's PR Manager henceforth. The connotations of that term after this movie are not so very desirable. As it is PR is a much maligned profession ( even the most unethical dimwit journalist doesn't hesitate to be rude to PR people..how I wish I could name names..GAH), couldn't Pradeep Sarkar have decided on some other field to serve as an euphemism for escort / call girl!!?

The movie is quite average in every aspect except the cinematography and the performances. Rani, Jaya Bachchan and Konkona...wonderful performances by all three. Kept me totally engrossed throughout the movie.

Well..maybe not totally engrossed. The theatre was full of small children...annoying noisy cranky children. Is it only Indians who don't think twice before taking their toddlers and babies to see a movie clearly meant for adult viewers at 10 in the night? I don't blame the poor kids for crying and fussing. I do want to slap their parents. This little nightmare behind me kept blowing spit bubbles through the gap in the seats. Oh and from time to time she lost control of all 10 of her balloons so they came and boinked me on the head while I was getting teary eyed at Rani's dilemma ( what!? I get teary eyed watching the Airtel ad with the grandson and grandfather also..I'm that kind of a person. ) After the third time that I got boinked on the head I finally turned around and told her mother that I would burst all the balloons if she didn't stop this behaviour. To which the cow replied "Arre bachchi hai..." Which is MY POINT EXACTLY!! Bachchi hai...why the hell is she in the theatre at 10 in the night and not at home sleeping!!? And why the hell are you not stopping her from blowing spit bubbles and chucking her balloons at people!!?

Speaking of annoying children and their uncivilised parents, unfortunately I live next to some. Those two little boys don't seem to go to school ever. Leaving home at 9 in the morning? They will be running around downstairs..trying their best to come under the wheels of your car? Coming home at 8 in the evening? They will still be playing downstairs, this time maybe inside your parking space. Sleeping at 6 a.m? They will be screeching in the corridor outside, thereby making sleep impossible. Napping on a Sunday afternoon? They will be playing football in the corridor using your front door their goal post. Have plans of lying in bed till 10 am on Saturday morning? Not only will they be playing football in the corridor with your front door as their goalpost, this time their father will be acting as the goalie...finding it fit to yell "GOAL" just outside your door at 8 am....on a Saturday. Their mother has 3 maids...one to cook, one to clean and the other to do what I'm not sure. She is a housewife. Doesn't even work from home. Just spends all her time gossiping and chatting with her friends in the building. The other day I got home around 10 at night and those junglee children were at their little football game outside my door again. This time I stepped out of the lift just in time to catch the even more junglee father kicking the ball at my door and screeching GOAL!!! Ah man!Something in my head just snapped. I don't think Ive ever given a grown man, a stranger that too, such a scolding in my life. To his credit, I must say, he took it very well..hanging his head and apologising...mumbling that he didn't realize they were being such a nuisance etc. Thankfully the corridor games have stopped, for now at least. The boys continue to give me heart attacks every time I try to take the car out or come back home and try to park.

Anyways, on a totally unconnected note, I am being flashed by a woman in my gym. Everyday. She steps out of the shower or the steam room...stark naked with the towel in her hand. She comes out..totally unconcerned about the fact that her private parts are being displayed to a room full of women...and grins very happily at me. Then stands right next to me towelling herself dry while I try to change into my tracks and t-shirt as unobtrusively as possible. I am not sure if she also smiles and greets others in the changing room as happily as she does me, mostly because I'm usually occupied with focusing on the spots and stains on the floor, and avoiding looking at her completely. Apparently the gym management has told her not to walk around the changing room naked, but she says "So what? We are all women in the changing room". I should be worried about this odd behaviour right? Being smiled at by random naked women might be the stuff that fantasies are made off for men but the experience embarrasses me TOTALLY. And also frightens me a bit. She has really big teeth..like the big bad wolf in Red Riding Hood. What do you think I should do? How to tackle this problem?

9 Comments:

  • Hmmm. The staying alone part in life doth get a person cranky beyond measure. Confucious said that once I think. Maybe twice.

    About Laga Chunari me Daag - I watched a bit of it and slept away. Never did see the PR bit. Somehow - didn't care much either.

    About kids in theatre - feelings shared. I shall have some of them for my next snack I think - now that you have reminded me.

    About kids in coridoors - they have laws against such types in 'abroad' countries. India teo hoye jabe. Kintu till then the only solution is to bear the pain and play the dholak outside the neighbor's flat at 2am after one of their religious festival ends and they are sleeping exhausted. Or your way isn't too bad as well.

    About naked women in gym. An alien concept to me. In the gyms I have been, sadly this hasn't happened. Once I see a shower full of naked women I will be in a better position to write an informed comment.

    By Blogger Soham Pablo, at 11:14 AM  

  • A kid bawled and kept on kicking me on a flight. The mother smiled and said, arey bachcha hai. I couldn't sleep or rest because of that child. He bawled and sent orange juice flying.
    Sigh.

    By Blogger Dreamcatcher, at 7:07 AM  

  • oh god. remind me to tell you about my deliberate-physical-molestation-by-woman story.

    By Anonymous sayoni, at 3:44 AM  

  • Sympathies. You COULD give the kids a grenade to play with. I the parking lot, to minimise damage to your apartment.

    Nekkid wumman ... ANY nekkid person in close proximity in a public space is pretty gross. No matter how well-toned. Or would you not object if it was, say, John Abraham in her place?

    J.A.P.

    By Blogger J. Alfred Prufrock, at 11:40 PM  

  • hahaha...hey i sooo understand this naked thing..here in HK not one..ALL women roam ard naked in the changing room...i mean its disgusting!!!...the first time i was like..."oh my gawd..am I in a strip club!!

    By Blogger Ekta, at 6:02 AM  

  • I would make it a point to give the naked woman a vastly amused smile, a smothered laugh each time she flashed. If she is not worried about your discomfort it is time to hand a little back.

    As for the kids, what do I say? Perhaps they will turn human when they grow up? I do know how hard it is to tackle babies on aircraft. Don't be too hard on those who can't make them shut up and sit still. I used to be very hard on such mothers and now suffer agonies of embarrassment each time I fly.

    And yes, the movie was not so great except for the acting -- which was superb.

    By Blogger Sue, at 1:29 PM  

  • @soham: a shower full of naked women will im sure be just what you want at this point..but that does not solve my problems!! hrrpmh.

    @dreamcatcher: i feel bad for parents with cranky kids on flights. however that does not mean they can allow their child to kick at random strangers. the parents in question need to be kicked themselves...grr.

    @sayoni: tell tell..wait, ill call you..less public a forum than this blog.

    @j.a.p: i would indeed object is i were confronted with a naked john abraham..i dislike the man very much. but then as you said, a naked anybody in a public placeis disgusting...even if its aamir khan or george clooney (sigh). incidentally, i did walk into the mens changing room..many years ago and...umm...maybe a separate post on that sometime ?

    @ekta: how gross!!!

    @sue: arre i dont object to small children crying on trains /flights. their parents have to travel. but its not the same thing when it comes to movie theatre.one does not HAVE to bring to ones baby /ill mannered child there. i know couples who wait for a movie to come out on dvd because they cant find anyone to babysit while they go to the theatre. and as for the brats on my floor...aaarrrggghh!!! i have no sympathy or empathy or any kind feelings for their parents. bunch of junglees!! gragh!!

    By Blogger Ron, at 3:39 AM  

  • Going for Om Shanti Om this weekend WITH baby in tow. Hope to see you there too *evil chuckle*

    By Anonymous Shrabonti, at 11:36 PM  

  • hey..came here thru rubaru's blog..i think u n i go to the same gym!!!! i have a naked flashing woman problem in too!! and i kept thinking there is something wrong with me coz all other women seem to be OK, only the trainers are sniggering..ur in blore right?? and gym is in ulsoor?
    gypsy

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 12:55 AM  

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